Revolution of 1896: Epic Fail!!!

This Thursday, US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton and pimp mommy will visit its ‘ho in the ASEAN, our country. Aside from the usual PR shit about how much she cares about Flood victims, our colonial master is deciding to put its weight in the much gawked at VFA. Expect tons of protesters and sycophants to show up.

Why the hate for America you might ask? Why despise a country that “liberated” us from the weaboos and gave us independence?


Simple: we never needed their help to begin with.

Civilized Indios

Perhaps one of the grandest tragedies and the best secret Empire ever kept is the insertion of the Philippine Revolutionary victory. Completely forgetting of course how they snatched it from us just when we were about to take it.

After they subjugated and pawned at least 200,00 people (by American estimates) they decided to co opt our God awful historian, Zaide. Rewriting and destroying all traces of American blood in the archipelagos, the collaborating writers decided to keep on assimilating the benevolence of our new Imperial masters. The Banaue Rizalista sects are products of this forced assimilation.

This singular act of douchebaggery generated a ton of lulz. Mostly to the white guys whose descendants are now enjoying the fruits of their ancestors labors:
Hopefully she won’t be killed for the insurance.

Now to all those who pout over how we shouldn’t go all ape-shit over something that happened an hundred years ago, consider this. We could actually have a nation completely built by Filipinos. Sure there would have been no UP or Baguio as it is, but c’mon without Manifest Destiny we’d probably have a lot less bitchin. Just ask this guy.


Final word in the Pinoy Interwebs

  1. “Hopefully she won’t be killed for the insurance” hey! do you even know the guy?! saying hopefully is almost saying that he might. And what insurance? I have many western friends who’s been married to Filipina like me and none of theme make an insurance for a lady.

    and what’s with “We could actually have a nation completely built by Filipinos” Philippines is ruled by Chinese and American business men (do they do something about that?).

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